Which Retro TV Commercial Describes You?

Pop open a time capsule of jingles, mascots, and miracle claims to discover which classic ad archetype matches your vibe—fizzy cola anthem, cartoon cereal chaos, late-night infomercial hype, or spotless detergent hero.

10 Questions 0 Taken

Question 1 of 10

The director shouts “Action!” What’s your opening shot?

A street fills with dancing strangers as a bottle cap pops.

A cartoon kitchen with a sunny window and a bowl that smiles.

A dramatic zoom on a frustrating mess, then: “There’s got to be a better way!”

A close-up of a stubborn stain meeting its match.

Question 2 of 10

Pick your signature jingle line.

“Catch the sparkle, share the moment!”

“Crunch into magic mornings!”

“Slice, dice, and simplify your life—tonight only!”

“Whiter, brighter, done right-er.”

Question 3 of 10

Choose your must-have prop.

A shiny can with perfect condensation beads.

An oversized spoon and rainbow sprinkles.

A headset mic and a table of unbelievable gadgets.

A measuring cap and a basket of impossibly fresh towels.

Question 4 of 10

What problem do you solve in 30 seconds?

A party with flat vibes and no sparkle.

Morning blahs before school or work.

A kitchen drawer that eats utensils and time.

Mud, grass, and spaghetti sauce on your favorite shirt.

Question 5 of 10

What’s your retro wardrobe?

Letterman jacket and neon windbreaker.

Mascot suit with googly eyes and a cape for no reason.

Blazer with rolled sleeves and unshakeable confidence.

Crisp apron, rolled cuffs, and spotless sneakers.

Question 6 of 10

Who are your co-stars?

A citywide chorus of new friends harmonizing in a plaza.

Animated kids and a sassy talking toaster.

An audience gasping and dialing furiously to order now.

A lovable family who keeps making messes you can fix.

Question 7 of 10

Pick your special effect.

Slow-motion fizz with shimmering lens flares.

Saturday-morning cartoon boings and starbursts.

Split-screen before-and-after with a giant “As Seen on TV” burst.

Microscopic stain molecules getting blasted into oblivion.

Question 8 of 10

Where does your ad air?

Prime time during the big game.

The Saturday morning cartoon block.

Midnight between sitcom reruns.

Afternoon homemaker hour.

Question 9 of 10

What’s your tagline energy?

An inclusive anthem everyone can sing.

Punny, rhyming, and covered in sprinkles.

Urgent countdowns and limited-time bonuses.

Calm assurance with a scientific seal of approval.

Question 10 of 10

Your ideal viewer reaction?

Goosebumps, grins, and group high-fives.

Giggles and a cereal-milk mustache.

“I didn’t know I needed that, but I do—operators are standing by!”

“Finally, my whites are actually white!”